Fitness Training For All

Surrounded by Jen's! 

Now that summer is nearing the end, we usually have the best shaped bodies of our lives.

I said usually… In July, I had a meltdown of some sorts. Instead of continuing the regiment of waking up at 5:00 a.m. and going to Training For Warriors for a 6 a.m. workout, I went on vacation with the family to California with full intentions of going to the hotel gym to workout.

In two weeks of vacation, my temptations got the best of me. I gained 13 lbs. I will say the feast of seafood was quite delicious at Fishermans Wharf in San Francisco!

When I returned home, I realized what a mess of  two weeks of vacation it was for me, eating wise. Everything I learned from the gym, including my nutrition intake when right out the door.

Since July, I had to redevelop that discipline to train and eat right again. I only allow for one cheat day and the rest of the week I am working hard at maintaining what I have lost. It’s not always easy. I know the UMW will be having a bake sale real soon at the Craft Festival on October 6, but instead of eating bad all week, I eat healthy, leading up to October 6 so that I can have some of those goodies! Last year, I devoured the Chocolate Pecan Pie!

I’d like for you to reflect upon 1 Timothy 4 as you read this.

Paul was hoping to visit with Timothy while in Ephesus, but since he did not, Paul writes him a letter giving Timothy practical advice about ministry.

Let’s look at 1 Timothy 4: 6-16.
6 If you put these things before the brothers, you will be a good servant of Christ Jesus, being trained in the words of the faith and of the good doctrine that you have followed. 7 Have nothing to do with irreverent, silly myths. Rather train yourself for godliness; 8 for while bodily training is of some value, godliness is of value in every way, as it holds promise for the present life and also for the life to come. 9 The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance. 10 For to this end we toil and strive, because we have our hope set on the living God, who is the Savior of all people, especially of those who believe.
11 Command and teach these things. 12 Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity.13 Until I come, devote yourself to the public reading of Scripture, to exhortation, to teaching. 14 Do not neglect the gift you have, which was given you by prophecy when the council of elders laid their hands on you. 15 Practice these things, immerse yourself in them,[c] so that all may see your progress. 16 Keep a close watch on yourself and on the teaching. Persist in this, for by so doing you will save both yourself and your hearers.

Paul is setting Timothy up with a prescription for success. I appreciate this disciplined approach to living as a follower of Jesus. Paul is essentially saying three things to Timothy in this part of the letter:

1. Put these things before the brothers.
2. Train yourself for Godliness
3. Command and teach these things so that you can track your progress, keep a close watch.

What does Paul mean by “put these things before.”

Paul's refuting the false teachers Timothy was facing. You see, if we go back just a few verses to verses 1 through 5, Paul was specifically calling out those who condemned marriage and eating certain foods.

In the church at Ephesus, there were two things being denied and forbidden. One was eating meat, and the other was marriage. Some people were teaching that if you became a vegetarian and single, then you would be closer to God. How about that? Married people, don't get any ideas! Gnostics at the time were teaching this. They believed that if you refrained from these behaviors, then you were close to God. The focus was more on the body and not the spirit. Paul was instructing young Timothy to discipline the spiritual side of oneself as well, that it couldn’t be just one area of your life that you focused on.


One year ago I weighed nearly 300 lbs. and my life was crashing in front of me.
I weighed 286 lbs. and I had no more energy. I was spent.
I was pre-diabetic. High blood pressure.
Headed towards a stroke.
My grandma had a stroke at the age of 44 and at the time, I was 43.

I knew I had to put this all behind me because I knew I was headed for disaster.

Then I was introduced to the gym. Not only has this gym helped me physically, I am more alert, I have a deeper relationship with my wife, I am a much healthier pastor to take on all that church planting has in store for me.

With my trainers, Colin and Adam, with Wes and Jenn (who is getting a sweat hug!!) 

Energy level is back! 

I am not a pre-diabetic anymore.
My blood pressure is normal.
I have the energy to go all day now without a break.
The discipline of the gym has helped me focus on life so much more and what God has equipped me to do.

Paul instructs the Romans and us to think holistically here. (Body, Mind and Spirit)

Romans 12:1-2 12 I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies (Body, Mind and Spirit) as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. 2 Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.

Transformation takes place when we put the things of the world behind us and strive for something more.

Transformation just doesn’t happen though. It takes discipline and it takes training. 

Before training, there was no way I was able to do more than a few push ups. However, with training and discipline, I now can do push ups with 70 lbs on my back. It didn’t just happen all of a sudden. This took continued practice.

It’s the same with our spiritual lives. Are we satisfied with just going to church for one hour on Sunday? What would it look like if we all were engaged in a small group, growing spiritually?

#2 Train Yourself For Godliness:

A follower of Jesus is one who walks in, right living. In order to live righteous, it’s crucial that we exercise our faith.

As a spiritual being, we must exercise ourselves, spiritually too, towards godliness. Paul helps us see that as he uses a metaphor of an athletic.


We are to exercise ourselves in godliness as much as an Olympic athlete exercises their body. Think of the time and energy, effort and dedication an Olympic athlete puts into their training. Their sport is their life. So it is to be with us as followers of Christ: godliness is to be our life. All of our energy, effort, time, and dedication should be given over to godliness. God prods us to the exercise of godliness.

As Paul refuted to Timothy, bodily exercise is profitable, we are healthier and feel better about ourselves, but godliness is more profitable, far more profitable.
We should exercise our body regularly; we should keep ourself physically fit.
But the focus of our life as Christians is to live a godly life.

The reason for all that I am telling you this morning is clear: godliness bears fruit—great fruit—both in this life and in the life to come. If we walk in the Spirit, we bear fruit of God’s Spirit; love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. God promises to bless while we walk upon this earth, and also when we receive the life to come. That alone makes me want to live a godly life! Because we are going to receive the fruit of our labor.



To live this way calls us to be consistent in our discipline. Don’t let anything hold you back in receiving that fruit. In verse 12, Paul writes to Timothy, “Don’t let anything hold you down Timothy. Some people will knock you down a level because you are young, but don’t let that stop you from being faithful.”


Paul tells Timothy to focus! But, this means we need to focus too. There are many distractions in our lives. There are the distractions of work, social media, sports, social pressures, the list could go on and on, and we all could say, I’m just too busy. I did for years as my justification as to why I couldn’t get to the gym. I kept saying, “I’m too busy.” However, I look back and now realize, “What in the world was I doing at 5-6 a.m. anyway?”

Distractions could have got the best of Timothy but Timothy was told to focus on reading the Scriptures, encouraging one another and teaching one another.
I’d like for you to think for a moment. How do you train spiritually? Do you set time to pray? Do you read the Scriptures? Do you fast? Do you worship? Do you spend time in small groups? Do you tithe? Do you serve? Do you visit those in need? Do you feed the hungry? So you seek justice?

Joining in devotion and Scripture at the gym before a workout.

These are what John Wesley called the “Means of Grace.”

What part of your life could grow by training spiritually?

Lastly, Paul told Timothy to “Command and teach these things so that you can track your progress, keep a close watch.”

I love this wording from Paul. Command.

Parangelle – means to declare, to order. Paul is saying, Order your life in a way and teach these things so that you can keep close watch.

As we look into the Scripture, we see the Bible mentions many times how Jesus went away to pray—sometimes early in the morning, sometimes overnight.

I’d like to challenge you as you read this. To take an inventory of your daily life. Where are you rushed? Where are you bored? Where can you pray? Where can you read? Where can you jump into a small group?

The thing is, I can’t make this decision for you.
It’s up to you to make the time… to put things behind, to train and to command your life.

See you at the gym! And in small group.

Entitlement Wreaks Havoc

Recently I was looking on Facebook at pictures of a friends recent trip to Yosemite National Park. It was a beautifully sunny day, views for miles, and smiles all around. My first thought was, "It's not fair, that they got to see the beauty of Yosemite and when I was out there in July, all I witnessed was smoke from the Ferguson Fires. 

Smoke covers Yosemite National Park

Picture I took along the Tioga Pass

As I reflect upon my emotions, I find that my mind was consumed with entitlement. What makes me entitled to have the best view? Why not be grateful for the fact that I was in Yosemite in the first place? Although I didn't get to see the historic landmarks in Yosemite because of smoke, I did get to climb the Pass over to Nevada. It's on that drive that I got to see God's beautiful creation. 

Entitlement can wreak havoc. Lately, I have witnessed entitlement at a deeper level. A few weeks ago, my area was witness to a mass shooting that left people dead after a gamer lost a video game. Two nights before that, our area witnessed shootings at a high school football game that left people dead. 

It saddens me to live in a time where many believe they deserve more than others and when we don't win or when we don't get a trophy for participating, entitlement rears its ugly head once again. 

Entitlement believes that we deserve more or that we have the right to have something. 

For the last 10 months I have been exercising at TFW (Training for Warriors) in Julington Creek. Before I started, I had the mindset that I deserved to be in shape and that I deserved to have muscles, simply because I worked hard and didn't have "time" for the gym. I made excuse after excuse. 

What I came to find out, was, no one was handing me a "fit" body. 

Almost 300lbs and made excuse after excuse

I was nearing 300 lbs, I was on blood pressure meds and was pre-diabetic. It was an ugly cycle. I kept telling myself, "Poor me, I have such a hard time getting up to exercise, so why not, let's just eat another burger." 

This entitled attitude was leading me down a dark path, one that would eventually kill me prematurely if I did not check myself and my ego at the door and humble myself to take a step in faith and the right direction. 

Muscles and a fit body don't come by napping and eating Oreos. It comes through vigorous exercise, discipline, and a regimented food plan. Since this change in November 2017, I have lost nearly 70 lbs, am not pre-diabetic and no longer have high blood pressure. 

Feeling like I am in my 20's again! After a long hike in Sequoia National Park

I am off my meds and now feel like I did when I was in my 20's. 

I've met many new friends along the way and we work hard to encourage each other. 

Some of the Familia at TFW

I say this because I see the same with our faith. We say we want God in our life, but do we do anything about it? We can get caught spiritually napping and eating spiritual Oreos while the good is right in front of us. 

Faith requires investment. James 2:14-26 says, "14 What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but has no deeds? Can such faith save them? 15 Suppose a brother or a sister is without clothes and daily food. 16 If one of you says to them, “Go in peace; keep warm and well fed,” but does nothing about their physical needs, what good is it? 17 In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.

18 But someone will say, “You have faith; I have deeds.”

Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by my deeds. 19 You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that—and shudder.

20 You foolish person, do you want evidence that faith without deeds is useless? 21 Was not our father Abraham considered righteous for what he did when he offered his son Isaac on the altar? 22 You see that his faith and his actions were working together, and his faith was made complete by what he did. 23 And the scripture was fulfilled that says, “Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness,” and he was called God’s friend. 24 You see that a person is considered righteous by what they do and not by faith alone.

25 In the same way, was not even Rahab the prostitute considered righteous for what she did when she gave lodging to the spies and sent them off in a different direction? 26 As the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without deeds is dead."

Yes, we are saved by faith through grace in Jesus Christ, but just because we are saved by God's grace does not give us the right to walk around with an entitled attitude. 

Jesus came to serve, not to be served. We too are called to serve, not to be served. 

I react very badly when mediocrity throws a tantrum of entitlement. - Lee Siegel

I no longer want to be mediocre. I want to be the best I can be for the Lord and for others. I hope you feel the same way about yourself and what God desires in you. 

Post-Hurricane Irma

On Monday, I drank freshly ground Fresh Market Creme Brûlée Coffee. On Tuesday, I sipped freshly ground Georgia Pecan coffee from Fresh Market. Wednesday, I had Maxwell House.

I was one of the fortunate ones in Florida.

This past week, Hurricane Irma roared into this state, wreaking havoc upon the entire state, Key West to Tallahassee, Miami to Tampa, and Ft. Myers to Jacksonville. We have witnessed nothing like it before. This one hurricane took on an entire state and beat it up. Beat it up badly. Millions of people did not have the luxury of freshly ground Creme Brûlée coffee. We are almost a week from landfall and many people still are without power.

I live in a new community in St. Johns County. This new community built right. Underground power, free from powerlines going down at the fall of a tree. We experienced power throughout as well as TV. My eyes were glued to John Bachman and Mike Buresh as they brought the news to us from Jacksonville. Tornado warnings in St. Johns County scare me, I couldn't sleep a wink through the night.

After a storm brought feet of snow in PA.

Monday, September 11th happened. For millions of Americans, we remember 9/11. For Floridans on 9/11/17, we were trying to make sense of loss from a hurricane.

I grew up in the Northern United States - Pennsylvania. We were used to Winter Storm Warnings and Blizzards. Occasionally, we would experience a snow that could bring 1-3 feet of snow. We grabbed milk, bread and salt. Snowstorms were fun. You hunker down, drink hot cocoa, have a fire, go sled riding and then shovel the driveway.

Hurricanes are different. You buy water. You buy flashlights. You buy generators. You buy canned goods. You buy medical supplies and first aid kits. You buy items to sustain you and your family to last days or weeks without power.

There is great fear in preparing for a hurricane. With 36 hours before landfall, you should have everything done. Then you wait. Waiting is odd. You just sit and wait for this thing to come.

Then it comes. Rain, little wind. Heavy Rain. Moderate winds. Pouring Rain, Heavy Winds and the roar of what people say is the "train." Having tornado warnings flash on your phone while you sit leaves a lump in the throat.

Like I said earlier, I drank gourmet coffee throughout. We were fortunate. But our area was not as fortunate. Hurricane Irma created a perfect storm for Jacksonville. High Tide, Storm Surge, South winds pushing the high waters of the St. Johns River all were occurring at the same time. Jacksonville was ground zero for where all this was converging. Waters rose quickly. Creeks that feed into the St. Johns was rising fast.

All around us, we realized, were a people in need. After the hurricane passed, we waited about 6 hours and still no cell service or internet. I drove to Mandarin where I could get a signal and notified all our Pennsylvania family that we were ok.

I looked at the church and the church looked ok, but it was not. The church had flooded during the height of the hurricane and had receded after. Tuesday, we came to church to find that our offices were flooded and that everything had to be removed and packed away. The more we looked, the more we found.

Wednesday, we began to call over 150 elderly people/families who we wanted to check on. We are so grateful for our office staff who came out to call these people. By late Wednesday, we had people calling in for needs in their neighborhoods. Some of our church family had total losses. One family in our church had over 3 ft. of water in their house and lost 75% of their belongings.

Emotions run high in moments like this. People are fearful and react so differently. I had one experience that I won't share that completely shocked me. The behavior was something I had never experienced before. On the flip side, I experienced the hand of God through the church and the community.

Our church responded this week in a way that has brought me to tears. You will see in this video a snapshot of the response of our young people and our older people who came out to help neighbors, family and our church. It is love in action. Take a look at this video.

Mandarin/Longleaf Response to Hurricane Irma

I am so proud of our church! Our mission at Mandarin is Transforming Lives by...Loving God and Loving Neighbor, Touching Hearts for God and Equipping the Young. Our Mission at Longleaf is Know God's Love, Grow in God's Love and Go With God's Love. Our communities of faith have taken these mission statements and have put them into action. 

The church gets a bad rap sometimes for only looking inward. Yes, that happens, unfortunately. This church at Mandarin has given itself a new identity and a new mission. We are a church who loves Jesus and we want the world to know that though our actions. 

I pray that our church will continue to love God and love neighbor in ways that will lead to life change and hope. Philippians 2:4 says this, "Instead of each person watching out for their own good, watch out for what is better for others. Adopt the attitude that was in Christ Jesus." 

We have so much work to do still with recovery efforts. In the midst of this clean up, God is going to do a great work in and through the people. I am excited to be a part of this journey.  I'm happy to share my freshly ground coffee with anyone who may need a cup of hot coffee!

How Shame Impacts Us and How We Are Encouraged to Respond

We all have heard comments like this before: 

"My dad saw me at a track meet after not seeing each other for a while. After my race, I went to say hi to him, and the first words he said to me were, 'You. Got. Fat.' I was hurt because we hadn't seen each other in months, and those were the first words out of his mouth."

“Hey, Jeff, you sure are fat.” (By the way, that was a comment I heard in 9th grade)

Shaming is a deflecting mechanism; we are take the focus off of ourselves and we place emphasis on others in a negative light, We we shame, we create divisions and do not build bridges to strengthen relationships.  In those moments of shaming, we encourage people to seek revenge and we do not provide solutions to whatever it is they find themselves in. 

Shaming doesn’t work. Yet, we do it all the time. We’ve seen a shift in shaming, as it is now an everyday part of our social media world, but shaming has been going on for a long time. 

I’d like to share with you a passage of Scripture where shaming is an underlying current in the situation that is before us. 

As we prepare to read this passage, we, the reader can see that we have a Samaritan woman who is at the well at noon. She’s there then because not many people are there at that hour. It’s hot. Why is she there then? For one, she is a recipient of feeling and experiencing shame. 

Let’s read. 

John 4:5-9

5 So he came to a town of Samaria called Sychar, near the field that Jacob had given to his son Joseph. 6 Jacob's well was there; so Jesus, wearied as he was from his journey, was sitting beside the well. It was about the sixth hour.

7 A woman from Samaria came to draw water. Jesus said to her, “Give me a drink.” 8 (For his disciples had gone away into the city to buy food.) 9 The Samaritan woman said to him, “How is it that you, a Jew, ask for a drink from me, a woman of Samaria?” (For Jews have no dealings with Samaritans.)

It’s important to understand the context to this passage of Scripture. When you hear the Samaritan woman asking this question, you have a greater appreciation for this moment, where this Samaritan woman was not shamed for once in her life! 

When a Samaritan woman came to draw water, Jesus said to her, "Will you give me a drink?" (His disciples had gone into the town to buy food.) The Samaritan woman said to him, "You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink?" (For Jews do not associate with Samaritans.)

The Samaritan woman was responding to the heart of Jesus that crossed barriers. She was absolutely amazed at Jesus' conduct, because she and other Samaritans were used to scorn and shame. That’s all this woman knew. She was thrown under the rug, ignored, made to feel “less than.” 

This was nothing new for her and for the Samaritans. The bitter hatred between the Jews and Samaritans goes way back, ”hundreds of years.” 

In 721 b.c. the Assyrians swept through Israel, the Northern Kingdom, and took the inhabitants off to Assyria. During their years in Assyria, many Jews intermarried with the Assyrians and Cuthites.

In 587 b.c. Babylon took the people of the Southern Kingdom, Judah, captive into Babylon. But in Babylon there was no intermarriage, and when the Jews came back to their homes they were of unadulterated Jewish blood. 

And because of this, they refused to accept their northern neighbors, and both sides developed an ugly hatred for each other, so they would say things to bring shame upon the Samaritans. 

The shaming was so bad that Jewish rabbis would say, "Let no man eat the bread of the Cuthites [the Samaritans], for he who eats their bread is as he who eats swine's flesh." 

And we know that was a “no-no.” 

A popular prayer in those days said, "And Lord, do not remember the Samaritans in the resurrection." So it was truly amazing when Jesus crossed those lines. Think about it. Jesus reached out to the unloved. He didn’t follow suit. He cared for those in his presence. 

So often we don’t realize the power of our words and our actions. The consequences of shaming can impact generations, not just individuals as we see in this passage from John 4. 

We hear this kind of talk and we see this negative behavior over and over again and we begin to say to ourselves, 

“I’m not worthy or I’m not good enough for love or there is no way I belong. I’m unlovable. I’m nothing.”  And this type of feeling can have effects upon our children and our children’s children and our children’s children’s children. 

It’s this kind of language of hearing in our heads “I’m not worthy or I’m not good enough”  that then becomes for us the voice of shame, and it becomes a feeling that we're all scared to even talk about or bring up. You know that the less we speak about it, the more we have and experience it. The more we dismiss it from our lives,the more likely we are to struggle with addiction, trauma, aggression, depression, eating disorders, bullying, and I could go on and on. 

I’m glad to see that Jesus encountered this woman who only knew shame because in her shame, she walked into this conversation with Jesus believing that she was flawed and unworthy of love and belonging. Jesus saw her as a child of God. I’m also grateful for this Samaritan woman, who moved beyond the shame she felt and was willing to even engage Jesus in a conversation. 

So often when we read John 4, we tend to focus on just the fact that this woman was married multiple times and was living with a man. We never really reside in the understanding that this woman, first of all a Samaritan, was a part of a community of people who were shamed for centuries. 

And the sad thing about this is...we still shame whole communities today. All because they are not like us. 

And that’s not how God made us to be, to be shamed or to shame. We are all made in the image of God and in that image We are wired for love and connection. That is what God desired for us to be - loved and connected. In relationship. When we are absent from that, we suffer.

A heart that is filled with love and not shame or hatred towards others is a heart that crosses the normal barriers of life and reaches out without shaming. A heart of Christ is  a heart and a mind that sees divine potential in its relationships. All relationships. A loving heart is a vulnerable heart, just as Christ's was. I must warn you, this is not a safe path, but it is the only way to go, if we truly want to be free of shame. 

As we can see in John 4 and in other passages, Jesus compels us to such a life. I invite you to accept that kind of life a life filled with love and not shame. Christ can fill that void. 

C. S. Lewis once wrote: “To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up save in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, ”safe, dark, motionless, airless,” it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.”

Hurricane Irma, No Communication And The Neighbors

After not sleeping the night of Hurricane Irma, I crashed in my bed early last evening. I awakened this morning to a phone that worked again and the ability to communicate with the outside world. 

I now see via social media the damage my friends all across the state sustained including here in the northeastern part of the state. 

Late last afternoon, I witnessed a neighborhood that had no power. Here is what I saw: neighbors talking to each other, 10's of dad's fishing with their kids, one husband and wife sitting on rocking chairs on their front porch while the husband played his guitar and sang, kids playing in the streets, people grilling and talking. I said to Alayna and Jaelin who were with me, "This reminds me of the 80's, when people took time for each other and invested in their community and one another." Today, we get to experience that again as rebuilding all across this great state of Florida begins. 

I close with these words from Paul to the Philippian church and community "Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others." Philippians 2:4 See you on the street!

Initial Help For Hurricane Harvey

As we all watch in complete shock over the historic flooding that has taken place in multiple places in Texas, we have an incredible opportunity to turn our empathy into action.

As United Methodists we are fortunate to have a Disaster Response team called UMCOR, (United Methodist Committee on Relief). The United Methodist Committee on Relief provides assistance to people in need and 100% of ALL donations go directly to the people in need.

Compelled by Christ to be a voice of conscience on behalf of the people called Methodist, UMCOR works globally to alleviate human suffering and advance hope and healing.

UMCOR is a Charity Navigator 4-star rated organization. United Methodist Committee on Relief has received a 4-star rating from Charity Navigator, America's largest and most-utilized independent evaluator of charities.

You can make an impact by doing two things immediately:

1. Pray. Pray for the people that are affected by this disaster. Pray that God will bring hope and restoration to each person affected. Pray that healing can begin and pray that God will deliver those still in harms way. Pray for all those who are in rescue operations at this time.

2. Give. Remember, 100% of your contributions go directly to those in Texas impacted by Hurricane Harvey. The link to give is below.

Click to Donate (Hurricane Harvey)

If you attend Mandarin United Methodist Church, you can give in worship on Sunday.
You may give cash in an envelope marked “Hurricane” or a check payable to MUMC with Hurricane in the memo, or give on line, selecting “other” and indicate “Hurricane.” (This is for those who will be in worship at Mandarin)

May God bless all those in harms way and may God bless you for your donation as well as your prayers.

I Cried.

The pain of hate. 

I cried. I haven't cried like that since I was a kid. And it came from the depths of my soul.

I pray every Sunday with our pastoral team at 7:30 a.m. There are five of us on the team and we have grown over the years to be vulnerable with one another.

This particular Sunday morning, prayer time came a day after the protests in Charlottesville, VA. We gathered around our circle and I listened to one of our pastors mention how they were really upset from the events of the day before in Charlottesville. I felt for this other pastor, because I could see the pain on their face.

And still will protect and serve. 

We began to pray in our group, all five of us pastors. This particular week, I went last. I began to pray and my prayer immediately went to what took place in Charlottesville. And in an instant, I began to sob. God immediately laid on my heart both pain and pride; all at the same time. Why would I feel that at the same time you may ask?

I felt pain. Pain for all people, especially the African American community this weekend, who are the recipients of hatred. White supremacists descended upon Charlottesville, wreaking of hatred and bigotry. The pain I felt in that moment was real. It hurt to know people I love experience this type of hatred daily.

This summer, my daughter began dating an African American young man. This young man is unlike any young man I have met before. He loves Jesus. Deeply loves Jesus. Regular church goer. Loves his family more than life itself and has a love for my daughter that makes me smile. He treats Alayna like a princess, the way she deserves to be treated.

My pain shifted some. My pain became more focused and went to Alayna and Jaelin. A most wonderful team! These two compliment each other so well. Jaelin treasures Alayna and Alayna treasures Jaelin. I thought of how Jaelin gets us to pray holding hands as a family around the table.  I thought of how Jaelin's grandma made a cake for Alayna so that our whole family could share. I thought about how we spent the day, both families in Pennsylvania playing at the natural waterslides in the mountains. I thought about how wonderful it was to know how happy my daughter is with this faithful young gentleman. And the pain felt for them wailed up again. Wherever they go, whether to the mall, or to the ballgame or just out to eat, they have to face scrutiny by people who are filled with hate. Stares, whispers and more will be the norm for them. All for what? Because of skin color? Really?

I cried harder and could barely get a word out in my prayer. Of of my dearest friends and sisters in the faith, Debbie let go of my hand and embraced me as she knew that Jeff St. Clair doesn't cry much.  She knew that Jeff St. Clair's faith in Christ allows him to get through many tough situations. She took on my pain at the same moment, as did my other brothers and sister in that circle.

In this moment I was reminded of a quote I once heard by Khalil Gibran, "Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding." In that moment of this prayer, my shell, that held back my understanding of how others feel this kind of hatred was shattered. I felt pain for others on an entirely different level. The last thing I want Jaelin and Alayna, as well as millions of others who experience hatred by supremacists, is to experience hurt, whether emotional or physical. NO one deserves to be hated upon. Hatred is a sin. Racism is a sin. White supremacy, or any kind of supremacy is a sin. There is NO justification for this behavior. This type of behavior is so far removed from the Gospel of Jesus Christ than anything I know.

When we, as United Methodists come into membership of the church, we are asked three questions:

1. Do you renounce the spiritual forces of wickedness, reject the evil powers of this world and repent of your sin?
2. Do you accept the freedom and power God gives you to resist evil, injustice and oppression in whatever forms they present themselves?
3. Do you confess Jesus Christ as your Savior, put your whole trust in his grace, and promise to serve him as your Lord, in union with the church which Christ has opened to people of all ages, nations, and races?

These are covenantal questions that we make with God and the community of faith when we join the church? A covenant. A promise to God that we will reject wrongdoing and we will resist oppression and injustice. A vow that we will promise to serve God in unity with people of all races.

I now see these questions in a new light. I see these covenantal questions with the lens of unity for one another. The pain I experienced in this prayer time allowed me to see so much. I gained an understanding of something I did not see. God forgive me for not seeing the pain of the inheritors of undeserved hatred. Forgive us all for our hatred towards anyone who is not "like" us.

After our prayer ended, this early Sunday morning, I was embraced by our team. We hugged. I cried more. They offered words of comfort. I love them for that.

In this moment, I also felt pride. Pride in Jaelin and Alayna for letting love of one another be the dominant trait in this relationship. The love they both have for Jesus and for each other is far greater than any fear a hater can impose on them or others.

Alayna said to her mom recently, "I feel sad when I see people not liking my posts or dad's posts on Facebook as much when a picture of me and Jaelin is posted." Alayna, don't be sad. Be sad for those that let differences outweigh our commonalities. Be sad for those who are restricted by those differences. God created us all in His image. I thank God for the beauty of that image, an image of diversity.

Friends, we got a long way to go. It is my prayer as I write this that you become transformed by the renewing of your mind and let love for one another be the dominant trait in your display of how you treat others.

"Do not take revenge on others or continue to hate them, but love your neighbors as you love yourself. I am the Lord." Leviticus 19:18